Published by Alienleonardo Productions Copyright 1999


Episode 1: Brain Teaser

Twas a dark and rather relaxed night. The moon was a billion lightyears away and all to be seen was black. Not that it's a bad thing, in fact the blackness is the foreverness which unlimits our view and deprives us from understanding the word; neverending...

     Archan, an obnoxious, facecious hypocryte of an alien being, creature, thing or whatever you'd prefer to believe he is, rests assured he will not be escaping captivity any time soon. Really he's similar to us, he has feelings and temperments. He likes to sit at home on Sunday nights and watch the Worlds National Cranium Boxing tournaments.Which brings us to another subject... the world. Not a world as we would presume, more or less a structure, manufactured of enormous mounds of planetary metals, maybe a few slap togethers of several different planets, the Monkeys do know how to shop. Hell I'm surprised the entire Domain has not yet crumbled away by now and drifted off into the emptyness which surrounds it. Monkeys, ha, what do they think they are, Geniuses? Oh well, these are just the ramblings of a tired old morsel, nothing more for me to think of in this life but what I've experienced... one day I will find someone who would find great strength from what I have to tell, I think at times... if never I do, such a waste of good strength.

     "Delyle... Delyle wake up! I hear them coming." Archan attempts to use his telepathic sense to break in to Delyle's head and wake him up. Unfortunately Delyle's brain is too small, and will not react to the incoming mind signals.
     "Toasted rat tails!" Archan yelps. "One of these days I'm gonna build you a brain that won't annoy the piss out of me! Craxoid! they're in the sector, I don't know what it is I did, I kept my thoughts to myself, and my inventions completely covered and coverted! I'll just... I'll just stop wasting time thinking and hide somewhere..."
     In just seconds, the futuristic prison cell door swings open, full thrust, and there... standing like a bug headed scientist drooling over their notes and figures, appears the Bulbous Primatous. In other words, the bulb headed monkeys, the hugous Cranious of the primate creatures of the galaxy. These monkeys are equiped with high performance brain activity. They can use a feature with their minds similar to the "force" only instead of cutting off your air supply, it rather tickles the opposer to a near death. The one thing the monkeys don't have control over is, mental moving, I don't recall the name of it, you know that thing ( Carrie ) had.
     At any rate, the leader of the bulbous primatous approaches Archan who's standing aimlessly in the middle of the room still trying to find a hiding spot...
  "Oooh Where is the time manipulator? Oooh Oooh, we know it is here, we sense the presence, if you tell me where it is I'll see to it that you become chairman of the marketed creation. We will give you roses, Oooh"
 "Nope, sorry, no can do man, don't know a darn thing!" Archan coverts his operation.
 "Then we have no choice but to say... Alright! sorry to bother you, our senses were wrong and we are going back to where everything was chaotic again, remeber to shop at Monkeys R you!" ...and with that, they had finally ceased the prison cell. Archan is left to ponder some more about how to perfect his time manipulator.
"That was close, actually, no it wasn't. Wait, they could be tricking me...."
Just then, the door busts open and the monkeys find Archan thinking about his time manipulator, enough evidence to search the premisis.  They bring in an entire cleaning crew and devour the little prison cell, leaving no item unbroken.
"Alas! we knew you had something, that big brain of yours can't keep that quiet, Oooh ooh Ahh Ahh!". The Head monkey then asserts his crew... "Monkeys, take the manipulator to the lab!"
"No, it still contains many errors!" shrieks Archan, "Don't be fooled!"
Strikingly the Head monkey darts his face into Archans, "I would simply like to inform you that it is our duty to FOOL and be fooled, to take and return well used. To Conquer all the jungles of the planets. To destroy all the Vaseline containers left in the galaxy! To..." He's cut short by dissapearring into thin air, then suddenly whisking back into view again.  One of the two monkeys carrying the manipulator says to the other... "Hey, watch the buttons, you could really get someone hurt!"
The leader commands his comerades with a fierce and directed voice, "To the Lab vessel!"
The crew of white coated monkey creatures standing in perfect formation immediately scatter everywhere, running a horrible muck on their way out the exit.  The head monkey slams the door on his way out, yet pops his head back in to look at the doors lock hole... "Ooops, I shant forget this key... Ahh!" And the door seals.
"Curses! What should I do?" Archan asks himself. "This cell is only so many layers thick. Hmmm. Perhaps if I go back in time to communicate with barbaric earth prisoners, yes, but, my time manipulator has been stolen...  that will not work.  Orrrrrr" He glances over to Delyle still sleeping. "Yeeeeesss, with his unbreakable sleeping technique, we could break through the walls, and possibly out of here for good! but what, what is it that could actually break his sleep?" He takes a nearby mallot made by the ruccous of the monkeys exit, and proceeds to wake up Delyle by whacking him with the mallot sequentially. "The blasted dinosaur still sleeps" I wonder, if all those blows to the ears didn't wake him up, I doubt any loud noises will either. There's probably some way that I haven't thought of...hmmm...
Suddenly Delyle awakes... "mmmmmhhhrrrrrrrrrooouuuuwwwaaaaaawwwwwchchchch, why is the light on at 2:75 in the morning?"
"Delyle! wake up" says the frantic Archan.
"I am awake.. why is the light on?"
"Delyle, I have perceived a magnificent idea! I need to program your brain to do something that your personallity wouldn't condone."
"Then why would I want to do it? Lights off.." The lights obey his command.
"Lights on!" O.k. what I meant was, I can break out of here with your help!"
"That's something to listen to" replies Delyle."What do I have to do?"
Archan gives him an assurring stare, "Sleep, that's all you have to do."
"Good, lights off." Delyle is fast is asleep in seconds.
"Perfect, mmmwhoohoowhooahaahaa."
"Don't give me brain damage!" Says Delyle lifting his head quickly to speak, then back down again, startling Archan to a near extreme. Archan rubs his hands together in wickedry and the scene fades into several views of Archan hard at work, performing brain surgery on Delyle. He works all throughout the night with no breaking intervals, of course anything like that could damage Delyle for life... but that wasn't such a tragic circumstance to Archan, he was rather conserned with his time manipulator, which could in fact save Delyle anyways if something were to go wrong.  Nevertheless, it was time to expirament.
Archan washes his hands and takes hold of his homemade remote control for Delyles head. He switches the little lever to the activate setting. Delyle's eyes then open. They have a red glow like the terminators, and he robotically stands.
"Hopefully my hypnotic emulator will allow me to command verbally... Here goes nothing" the obey setting is selected.
"Hello, do you have any feelings?" Archan asks the entranced Delyle. In reaction, Delyle walks to a nearby wall and proceeds to hammer his head against it, in attempt to test for pain...
"ooooh, I hope that heals by morning" Archan says under his breath.
"No" it replies after its legitamate proof.
"Good! now whack the wall as hard as you can with your tail."
The soulless Delyle crashes his tail into the wall, releasing a hiddeous metal bending noise all around the cell. Just a mere bit of damage is all it accomplishes.
"Ok think Archan, maybe if I have him charge right through the door... alright, Delyle, run through that door as fast as you can..."
The big programmed Delyle patters his feet like a bull. One second, Two, Three... He charges. A quick swoop across the cell and CRASH!!!! The boom broke everything in the room again, yet the door...
remained completely in tact. Not even a dent.
"This is going somewhere... slowly."
"Ok Delyle run through the window." The window is their only source of outside visibility. Unfortunately all there is to see is space. The prison cell is located at the bottom of the entire city ship inwhich the Bulbous Primatus posess full reign.  There lives one hope in Archan's big, fat mind, and that is, that the city ship contains a forcefield which preserves the oxygen, and protects the entire vessel. Archan had previously spent much time studying the movement of transacting ships between the inside and outside of the forcefield. He drew a conclusion that the gravity outside the ship was different from the gravity inside, thus it would push anything towards the ship, enabling an easy walk up to the top.
Delyle rushes towards the window, plunging through it like water. His legs still scrambling in mid air as the gravity slows his flight, reversing his direction right back into the cell... Crraashh! An omni alarm goes off.. Red alert. Red alert. Gravitational balance of ship dismembered, calling all units! Red alert! Running ship scan.  By the time the monkeys react to the alarm, Archan is already almost to the top of city vessel. Running and running up the ship as fast as his weak unexcersised leg muscles can take him. It's quite a long hall yet, the ship is only a few hundred miles high, and wide. Of course the monkeys have that exact measurement.
The monkeys stomp their way down to the suspected source, Archan, yet it takes a while for them to arrive.
In the meantime Archan reaches a loft on the ship, taking him to an overhang where he can catch a glimpse of the monkey ruled city... oooh eeeh oooh ahh ahh.
Delyle, patiently waiting for an order, lay in his wrecked position. The eyes loose the red glow, and he almost wakes up, but it will yet be something else, with greater impact which will wake him. The eye lights again illuminate...     Rumble... Rumble... Rumble... Slam!! goes the cell door. Delyle remains expressionless.
"The wall mended in this room!" the head monkey yells, while looking around for an answer.
"Where's Archan, dinobot?" says head monkey to Delyle. The dull stare off into some odd directions upsets the monkey, the monkey is then forced to scream.
"Where, I said where, fool? answer me or see to a near death!"...still, no answer.
"Whhaabugidugubijuga" Hollers head monkey apparently in his own language. His eyes grow evil.  He never is subject to opposition. As the head monkey, his poor victimized soul has been the result of being tremendously spoiled. Let's say oh.. 20 times that of Caesar.
"If you don't answer me, I will make a great effort in torchering you, with my crew, and on my own. What does it answer?"
By this time you're probably thinking, jeez give it up you pathetic monkey. If so, good! That means you're being logical.
Needless to say the Leaders head begins bubbling like a microwaved hotdog, his eyes become wider than his face. He then instinctively attempts one of his many forms of torcher... The inside-out tickle test. No one in the galaxy has yet to resist a monkeys tickle test. This test is a famous one. It was responsible for the 194,005 madness outbreak on planet Jerusulem, founded by earthonites. It was responsible for the 197,553 continental suicide on Remulax founded by Crustacianites. It's been a cruel hundred thousand years with the Bulbous Primatus lingering around every quadrant in the galaxy.
The monkey leader stares Delyle down over and over again, squeezing out every bit of mental energy possible. One monkey off to the side whispers to another, "I hope he isn't enjoying himself."
One strain, two strain, that's it. The leader comes to the conclusion that something is enablng Delyle to resist. There's no way anything in their right mind could resist the treatury of the tickle test.
"We'll just have to take him to our, Ahhh Ahhh! lab. There, perhaps we can tap into, Ahhhhh!, his brain to collect our sought information. In the meantime, get out there and find that alien! ooh ooh." He departs the room after his order is understood.
The monkeys all gather around Delyle attempting to lift him, but he's just too heavy. They try once again, they lift, and struggle... but the dino is still too heavy to actually get to their lab.
"Hey boys" one says to the others, "didn't boss say to go find the alien?"
"Yeah"
"Yeah?"
"uhuh" they respond simultaneously.
"Well, how are we supposed to carry dis guy PLUS go find the alien, PLUS haul em' both back?"
A silence falls over the group, they look at eachother aimlessly for an answer.
"Well we can't, so let's go home!" Everyone cheers and raves. They again break off into a blurry hurricane of monkeys devouring the little that's left in the cell on their way out the door.
Archan is just about to the over hang, his tread becoming tougher and tougher...
"If only I had a robotic dinosaur to ride so it could do the hard parts.." hufff.... Pufff....
He arrives at the top of the overhang where just as he's about to see the metal fold back revealing an entire city, he drops to the ground, passing out from exhaustion.
Delyle suddenly awakes. He peers over at the broken window covered by an additional wall.
"Hmmm" must be an emergency seal, I bet Archan didn't know that was coming...."Delyle pans around the room in wonder.
"Well, in the name of Chris Farley, what did I miss?! Archan! Where are you, you little sack of brain tissue! Where are you?!" He stops to think for a spell, until he finally remembers Archan telling him that he was going to break them out of there.
"Oh no, Archan accidently got free without me ! Not to worry, I'll save my little frail friend !"
He stamps his big, clawed feet which gouge the floor as he makes off toward the window. His determination combined with the intense oblivion of reality, helps him to easily break through the new wall. He enters the outside zone of the ship still racing his legs through the air. The gravity again pushes him right back into the cell, but if he climbs out in time he'll miss the closing safety seal wall. He pants and crawls out of the window as the Red Alert sounds off.
The camera rotates 90 degrees counter clockwise as we see him stand and dust the glass off of himself. He looks down to the ship in search for any tracks left by Archan. Slowly but surely, he realizes he's free.
"Wait a second, I don't need him, he left me here to rot anyway! What a friend!"
Delyle scrapes his giant foot claw onto the ships side darting him off into a nice happy little swing walk.
Before long, a crew of Mothguards approach from the southeast equitorial zone of the ship flopping around aimlessly yet pacing foward every few seconds..FLOP! PING! BLAT! BIFF! Delyle, worried only because of his youthful mind hides behind a nearby pipeline made of some huge creatures asophagus. The Moths stop to check around, one fumbling down sideways after landing wrong.
"I'm fine" says the assistant Moth dusting himself off, over and over... and over... and over.
Delyle looks around for something to throw, in order to distract them. He resorts to a piece of invention part Archan had previously applied to his brain.
"Hope it doesn't do anything funny" says Delyle in a gullable, severe hope. He pulls a part from his neck and tosses it. Unfortunately due to his teeny Rex arm, the peice doesn't make it very far and the Moths shine their attention towards his direction and soon approach but stop at the nearby window onto which the metal had fallen. An inmate form from the planet Azarria looks out the window at the sideways Moth creatures standing on his window. One of the woman Mothguards wearing a skirt stands over the window looking down at the inhabitants who appear to be looking away and trying to avoid showing their faces. She picks up the peice of device analysing its structure.
"hmmm, doesn't look like a very intellegent contraption." she critiques.
By this time Delyle is already yards up the side of the air pipe, it was a close call but fortunately claws can move you laying down.
"I wish everyone had clawed feet" wished Delyle. "If I make it out of this alive, I will invent clawed feet for everyone!"
The Moths figure the noise was just a peice of space junk and turn to get back on their scooters. Suddenly a semi truck falls in front of them. One Moth says to another..
"Good thing it was just a little space junk"
"Yeah, and somebody needs to fix the gravity problem around hea." replies the other. "Hey lets go see what that light is"
And with that, they all levitate their scooters and spring off like popping popcorn kernels. PING! BATT! THUNK! BIFF! TICK! PLUNK... off towards the distant light.
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